Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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