I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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