Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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