Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
