I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
