what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize