Will you blow on my dice?
Umm I'm too high to move.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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