please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
NoShamevember. You game?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
