i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
