Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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