i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
