There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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