is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
She bit a glass in half.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Randomize
