dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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