have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
