I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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