worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize