ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
