i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
