what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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