the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
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