i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
