I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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