Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Randomize
