so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
