ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
