How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
