If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
