ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
It was confusing and full of hummus
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize