She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
