i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
