Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
