I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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