please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
