If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
