we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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