Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
