he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
