Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
