Are we in a gay sports bar?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
