How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
