Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize