I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
