LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
