Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
