I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
