I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
