My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
