I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
