I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
