I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
